Get in touch with them however you can. If your email is ignored, try to communicate with a private message through social media. If all else fails, you can try visiting them in person at their house. Reach out once and wait for a response before trying to reach them a different way. You don't want to make them feel harassed or pressured. If they agree to meet you via text or email, it may be best to meet in a mutual, public place so that neither of you feels intimidated or under pressure.
Your friend wants space and that should be respected. Use the time to reflect on the situation and prepare what you want to say. D Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. It will only upset them and make them frustrated with you. Talk about the problem honestly and openly. Explain what you feel is the problem and be honest about it. Then ask them to do the same. Let them talk for as long as they need to. This way, you both get to tell your side of the story and get everything out on the table.
For example, instead of saying, "You made a really dumb decision," ask your friend, "Why did you decide to do that? I'm having trouble understanding. This will prevent blame from being thrown around and create a more peaceful tone while you talk.
For example, instead of saying "You were a selfish jerk," say something like, "I felt like you didn't care about my feelings, and I felt really hurt by the things you said. Apologize to them and accept their apology. I want things to be better between us. If they apologize to you, accept their apology graciously. Avoid restarting an argument. It's important that you don't say or do anything hurtful during this conversation.
This will only further damage the friendship, and it may make things irreparable. Do your best to keep things peaceful. I will never trust you again! I am so sorry. I want to make things right, please tell me how I can do that. Part 2. Let go of your anger or frustration. Urge your friend to do the same. Leave the past behind and look to the future. Come up with a plan for rebuilding the friendship. What do you need from me, as your friend, to prevent it? I want to feel like they matter to you.
Discuss behaviors that are necessary for the friendship to heal. Be aware of why you ended it, and then you will know if you can go back if the circumstances changed. How you end up making contact also depends on the nature of your past relationship, adds Lauren Paul, cofounder of the Kind Campaign.
This means that you have to be prepared for the possibility that you might not hear from them. Try not to respond with the immediate swell of emotions you may feel. You may even want to sleep on their response and write back the next day. What did you do that you have realized hurt them? But we are already facing a loneliness epidemic , and relationship repair carries further urgency in the face of biological evidence.
And that means friendship is not a choice or a luxury; it's a necessity that is critical to our ability to succeed and thrive. If you've lost touch with good friends or drifted apart in the past year, it could be time to work through hurt feelings and misunderstandings.
Think of this work as a form of relationship and self-care, because being stuck in conflict saps valuable energy. Here are five ways to repair a friendship -- or leave it behind if it's toxic. Read More. Reflect and write down the good. Before you face a difficult conversation with a friend, pause and reflect. He also encouraged sharing that list in conversation with the friend. And no matter the outcome, the positive intention will remain. Choose a different way to communicate. If repair efforts have not worked via your usual tech channels, try a different way to communicate.
Manly says. Send your friend a text or call and tell her you miss her friendship and try and take the steps to reconnect. Would you be open to me calling you in a month to check in? Manly says not to dwell on past mistakes so the relationship can move forward with new, positive patterns. She is based in suburban Philadelphia.
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